Gosh, I’m a sucker for a riveting book. One of these days, I’m going to write a post about what an amazingly wonderful, sassy, diverse, and unbelievable group of women my book club is but until then, let me just tell you that we have all been meeting, in some form, for nine years now. We have seen ups and downs in each of our lives (admittedly, mostly mine but there have been other dramas as well…:))
Truthfully, I foresee us meeting for the rest of our lives. Even though we may not email, Twitter, Facebook, or, God forbid, speak to each other on a daily basis, we immediately pick up where we left off when it’s a beloved “Book Club” night. I love and cherish these women greatly.
On a side note, I have to miss our next gathering. My husband is whisking me away on an ski trip WITH NO CHILDREN.
Yes, I know. I should be excited. And I am. But…I’m missing Book Club, by golly. When I mentioned this to said hubby, it didn’t go over so well.
“So you would rather stay home and go to book club instead of spending a weekend away with your husband and, need I remind you, NO KIDS?” seemed to be his cleaned-up response if I remember correctly.
Hmmm…I want to go away with him. Really. I do. It’s just that the fact that I’m missing book club is putting a bit of a downer on it.
My very best friend, Jennifer (who will also be the subject of a future post), chose The Girls from Ames as her featured title and let me tell you…Oh my. I’m fascinated.
I’m only on page 82 and I can’t put the sucker down. It’s about a group of girls that have been friends for quite a long time (some since birth, others entered the picture in high school) – the “Ames girls” as in from Ames, Iowa. They are all about 41 years old, which is only five years older than me, thus making it that much more relatable.
It’s basically the story of their friendship with each other (all eleven of them) but in turn, it’s a story about female friendships in general.
It’s unfathomable to me to imagine what my life would be like without the presence of some of my closest girlfriends who have cried with me when I needed to cry, laughed with me when I needed to laugh, and drank margaritas with me when I needed to drink margaritas. I hope they would say I have done the same for them. I would do anything for my girlfriends because, when its all said and done, they usually know EXACTLY where I’m coming from.
We as women are made so strikingly similar though we have many differences among us, too. The longings of our hearts, our insecurities, our guilt in parenting, our worry over marriages, our bitchy, PMS time (except me of course), our love of chocolate…Yes, we are diverse. But oh yes…when push comes to shove, we are strikingly similar.
Perhaps this is what I am taking from this book the most. We are a sisterhood. Thank God for that. Truly.
Another thing I am loving from this book is Dr. McCormack, who was the father of one of the Ames girls. As Marilyn’s dad, he was gentle, loving and wise. He was a pediatrician in Ames and most of the other girls in the posse were his patients. They all remember him fondly and rightly so – to read about him is to understand that he was the kind of man that served as a guide not only for young men but women as well.
He lost a seven year old son to a car accident before Marilyn was even born. He knew some sadness in his life which is often the case with so many people who I have come to love and admire.
He had an unconditional, gentle way of teaching his children so that he never had to preach, yell, or patronize to make his point. Marilyn, who tended to be a “goody two shoes” kinda girl, actually once toed the line a bit and had a party complete with drinking and heavy petting (I’m so sorry – this term has always made me giggle. I needed to use it – what the heck really IS heavy petting?) It was right around the holiday season so everyone was in a festive mood. Especially the heavy petters.
When everyone had left, Marilyn cleaned up the house so sparkly that no one would have ever known a par-tay had been had. Except for the crack that she noticed in the front window. Her heart fell to her foot and she knew she needed to go to her father (note to self: create a trusting relationship with my teenagers one day so they WILL come to me when something like this happens. OK. Thanks.)
He was at his office. She told him the scoop. She was upset and said she would pay for every cent it would take to fix the window. She was so, so sorry.
He listened to her without saying anything. Then he stated “Well, I know you learned something from this whole experience. I bet you won’t do it again.”
He told her he would see if their homeowner’s insurance would cover the damage. He then hugged her and told her he loved her and was so thankful she was honest with him.
WHAT?! Seriously. This is completely the kind of parent I want to be to my teens. What restraint! What love! How incredibly graceful!
Marilyn returned home. Her sister inspected the crack. Turned out, it wasn’t a crack after all – a piece of tinsel from their Christmas tree had somehow gotten stuck on the glass and it simply resembled a crack. All that for nothing?
No. Marilyn claimed that she had learned something valuable about her father and how he would react to disappointment and he learned about her and her conscious.
So true, so true. In conflict, our true colors are revealed. It is the time in which our integrity, or lack thereof, can really be shown.
Here’s another nugget of wisdom that he shared with his daughter when she told him she was scared to go so far away to college: “Here’s what we’ll do. We’re going to keep you at the end of our fishing line. And if you ever need anything, you just give a little tug and we’ll reel you back in.”
May we all have at least someone who will reel us back in when we give a little tug.
I too am a member of this beloved book club… all nine years of it. It’s hard to imagine that: nine years. And we still have about 70 left to go!
I am lucky to have such an amazing group of “bookies” in my life… my sisters of words… who accept me and still love me even though I haven’t gotten through the last two book (blasted Grad. School). Who woulda thunk it. Me? Not finish a book? Gasp. The horror. But now, because of that blasted Grad. School, I will never wag my finger at another “bookie” for not finishing a book. Ha!
Thanks for the summary and “precious particle” (that’s what we’re calling them in one of my classrooms) Nat…. I will miss you terribly, but your words and ideas will be in my head and heart on book club night.
How DARE Old Spice torment you for wanting to be with us! hee hee.
Um…You were a founding sister. You and I are the only ones. :)
Nat and Kat forever.
btw- I think I’ve told 4-5 Nat stories this week. Your impact never ends!
Hey I’m glad you came by my blog, because I LOVE yours. How fun that you have such a great group for your book club. I tried to be a part of one for a little while, but it just never seemed to work with my schedule. I need to try to start one up again. It’s fun to read books and get to talk about it with a bunch of girls :)
Thanks, Crystal! I am about to Tweet your post on The Bachelor. Juicy goods – love it!!!
Hey cousin, thanks for giving me yet another book to add to my to-read list. :) I have talked about being in a book club for years but can’t seem to find enough interested people. It’s amazing that you guys have been getting together for so long!
YES! Read it!
What an inspiring story about how I hope I will parent my boys! Thanks for the book recommendation – I will add it to my list…but how do you find time to read with three underfoot?!
Well. I get this question a lot. Here’s the thing – I am OBSESSED with books. I am a total nerd – I don’t watch any TV shows (well…I admit that my husband and I are closet Bachelor fans when it’s on). I’m a complete dork – when people talk about “Lost” I am lost. When others chatted about “Glee” I was lost. I’m just lost about a lot of things EXCEPT reading. So I find time. I read far too late into the night (like don’t turn my light off until 12:30ish) then blame my kids for why I am so tired. That way I can sound like super martyr mom. There. Now you know my dirty little secret…:)
Thanks for reading, Kelly!
I love a good book, so I will be so sure to be on the lookout for this. I also love girls from Iowa as two of my best friends from college were Iowa girls : ). They were from DesMoines though. : )
.-= Life with Kaishon´s last blog ..Cutie Patooties =-.
My best friend just informed me that I have not even gotten to the good part yet…Yes, you need to go get it! :) Thanks for stopping by my blog. I enjoyed yours – great to “meet” you!
Oh how I love a good book club! Sounds like an awesome group of ladies!
.-= Caroline´s last blog ..Rainy Day Activity: Indoor Hopscotch =-.
Natalie,
Thank you for your tribute to Dr. McCormack. I am the sister who realized the crack in the window was tinsel from our Christmas tree. My siblings and I feel very blessed to have had the loving guidance of both of our parents. They were never judgmental, they trusted that we could learn from our experiences, and they always treated our friends with respect and dignity. We ask ourselves if we are doing the same for our own children and hope that we can give them the warm embrace of childhood that we felt.
WOW! Sara, how on earth did you find this post? Thank you so much for commenting. You made my day and probably the days of all of our book club girls! :)
Yes, your parents serve as a great model of the kind of parents I want my husband and I to be not only to our precious ones but to their friends as well.
I plan to post again on your father because my dear grandfather, Jack Lenox, sounds like his twin soul. He was a small town, beloved doctor with a gentle personality and later experienced dementia as well. I think this is why your father struck such a chord with me. I am crafting another post in my mind and plan to write it in the next two weeks.
Thanks for stopping by – please tell Marilyn how much we are loving this book!
Natalie,
Jeff Zaslow sent me the link to your blog today. If he sees any comments about Dad, he sends those along to us. Very sweet.
Your grandfather sounds a little like Dad and a little like his father who was a general practitioner in a small town in Maine. He took his doctor bag along with him on house calls. Both he and Dad gave us the gift of realizing that a stranger is one story short of becoming a friend. I wouldn’t be surprised if somehow there are only a few degrees of separation between your grandfather and someone I know.
I love your writing. Please let me know when you publish your story about your grandfather. I would love to learn more about him.
Sara
I’ll let Marilyn know that you are enjoying the book, too :)
Jeff Zaslow? As in the author of the book? Well. If you didn’t just make my WORLD.
Yes, my grandfather sounds just like your father AND grandfather. We still have his old leather medicine bag that he used on house calls. I believe he gave it to my uncle, who was his son, because he is now an OB/Gyn. Medicine sure does run in families, eh?
At my grandfather’s funeral, there was a woman there who grabbed both of my hands, looked me in the eyes and said, “Your grandfather. You have no idea. He did so much for me and my family.” Already weepy and eight months pregnant with my second child, I unleashed a flood on her that might have just scared her to death. He was also known to barter with his patients – there was a woman who did sewing for my family for years to pay off her medical debts to him. He would have been appalled at how medicine is run now and I suspect your father and grandfather would have been as well.
I’m so thrilled you like my writing. Thank you so much for the kind words and for taking the time to connect with me. I have your direct email now and will shoot you a message when I post on Grandjack. Thanks again for making my day and yes, please pass along our love of the book to Marilyn and the rest of those zany girls.
Umm… this is the coolest! I feel like I’m reading blog posts between celebs!
Yep- Jeff Zaslow, the author.
The bartering example made me think of how Dad used to barter with one father when he cared for the man’s daughter. The father raised spring-fed trout, so Dad would estimate how many trout a clinic visit was worth and we were all the beneficiaries when we had those scrumptious dinners. Grandaddy bartered, too. If it hadn’t been for my grandmother, I think Grandaddy would have simply forgotten to charge for his services. He had been quite poor as a child. A man who had only a fourth grade education had made money in the shoe business, I believe, and used some of his fortune to put young men through college, and in the case of my grandfather, through medical school as well. Dad told me that Grandaddy had a memorable house call. A mother was extremely sick. Her children were playing untended since she had no more energy. Grandaddy told her he had a new sulfa drug that might help her. “I don’t know if it will help you,” he said, “but without it you will die.” She agreed to take the drug. Within a half hour she was bright-eyed and reenergized. Grandaddy wept as he realized that he no longer needed to sit helplessly as he watched people’s health deteriorate from infections. Sulfa drugs were the wonder drugs befor penicillin was used.
Where did your grandfather live? Perhaps I’m getting ahead of myself since you will post the blog about him in a few weeks. I can wait if that is a significant part of the story. Thank you for letting me know that you will send a message to me when you post your blog.
Sulfa drugs. Wow. How awesome – I suppose that desire, that need to heal and cure people is what sparks all students to go to med school. At least I hope. Compassionate doctors strike such a chord with me… I continued to drive to Indianapolis after we moved to West Lafayette (about an hour away) for my prenatal care when I was pregnant with my third because my OB/Gyn there was old-school but not prehistoric in his knowledge. He has an amazing bedside manner and has so much integrity and…he was friends with my uncle in college (who later also became an OB/Gyn) and admired my grandfather. Everyone admired my grandfather but it said a lot to me that MY doctor thought highly of him and wanted to be exactly the kind of doctor that Grandjack was.
I’ve been brewing a Grandjack post for a while as the anniversary of his death just passed and he has been on my mind more than usual. I read about your father on the EXACT day (January 9) that my grandfather died three years ago.
I emailed you separately but for everyone else, Grandjack was born and raised in Lebanon, Indiana. He moved back after medical school and remained there until he died three years ago. We miss him horribly. His bride of 59 years at the time of his death, my Meemo, is still alive and kickin’ at almost 84. Her health is good and she is mentally 100% there. She is one of the greatest joys in my life and has guided me through so much. She is the epitome of grace and wisdom…OK. I will stop there – this is turning into a post. :)
Thanks for writing, Sara. Your comments have made me really think a lot.
That is the coolest. I haven’t picked up the book yet, but I’m not worried. I always read the good ones in 2 or 3 nights (and, like you, then blame my kids for my fatigue). So, I’ve got PLENTY of time.
Thanks for blogging on us, sista–I’ll save the bottle of la crema for the next meeting. Have a fantastic time “skiing” ;-)
Hi Natalie,
We were meant to meet each other. Perhaps Dad and your Grandjack chatted in the Great Beyond about how to introduce us to each other. How high tech of them!
I look forward to following your blog and corresponding with you via the web. Your stories about your family are very compelling. Thanks!!
Sara