I’m usually exhausted because of my two ornery boys, spaced an awfully-close-together-did-you-do-that-on-purpose- 15 months apart.
For the record, no, we did not. We are asked this question often and it’s alright – I know people are just curious. Solomon was our little surprise that was more pleasant than we could have ever imagined – even though I cried when I saw the second pink line. Even though.
While I love those two like crazy, they exhaust me physically. I am forever peeling someone off a location they were not supposed to climb and trying to wipe them clean only to find them filthy from God knows what moments later. Both of them average about two outfits a day and oh my…they are loud. Heads are always cracking due to some form of wrestling or running or headstands or…whatever. Mamas of boys know that we work from “son up to son down”.
When I am at my most exhausted, Sawyer, who possesses the crazy intuition of knowing when his mom is about to blow, will quickly attempt to lighten the eruption by saying “Mommy, you’re my best friend.” Solomon will literally grab my face and come at me with the scariest open-mouth kiss that would make even Jaws a tad bit envious. I say these things because while they make me so very tired, they really do melt my heart with well…their raw boyishness.
I absolutely adore it.
On the other hand, we have Susannah. Neat, tidy, articulate, witty, a budding writer, an artist. She is constantly creating, that child. Our home overflows with her work. She can often be heard saying “Those boys…” while shaking her head with a silly smile or telling everyone what they should be doing. We liken her to Lucy from “The Peanuts” and it’s a pretty accurate comparison.
She also possesses a belief in God like no other five year old I have seen. I don’t say this to brag about my child. I have a strict covenant with myself to never talk about how great my children are unless they are present to hear it. You won’t catch me broadcasting to the world that my child just won the spelling bee. I will not talk about how they are the smartest, or the funniest, or the you-name-it…Too much pressure, I say.
I will talk about how kind they are. How caring. How thoughtful. How they fed the hungry and clothed the poor. I’m not above that. No.
But Susannah? After today, I realized that she is the one that can make me mentally tired. But in good ways. Usually.
One of JJ’s peers, a fellow dentist in our community, was just diagnosed with cancer today. He has four children and a loving wife. He also has a ten centimeter mass in his hip socket. We are praying, praying, praying for this man and his family.
Susannah has been praying for him as well. So today when we were stopped right in front of his office, I suggested we take advantage of the red light and pray for him at that exact moment. For his healing, for his family. For it all, really.
The light turned green and we drove on but through the rear-view mirror I could see that she was pondering something. Right I was.
“Mommy, does God make cancer happen?” she asked.
Hmmm… I had to ask “What did you say, sweetheart?” to buy me a little bit of time.
I told her that I just wasn’t so sure how to answer that. I told her that God knows exactly when we will be born and when we will die. That he always works for good. That sometimes cells in our bodies just get really sick and God’s way of healing us is to bring us home to Him.
Basically, I was talking around the real question because I didn’t know how to answer it. I ended up confessing to this and and told her that no one really know the answer to this tough question. For crying out loud – scholars debate this exact topic constantly.
Satisfied with this answer, we went on to the Pizza Hut buffet lunch that was promised to all three. Big highlight of the week.
A few days ago, JJ had mentioned that we want her to tell us when she goes outside and if she chooses to play with a neighbor because while most people are good, there are some out there who are not-so-good. We have discussed those not-so-good people as of late because she is showing the need for a little independence and freedom from the “younger brother comedy show” that is often going on in our own yard.
On a completely separate note, we have lately been discussing the dangers of choosing to smoke cigarettes and that this is how Grandpa Richard and Grandpa Jerry both died.
So tonight as we are laying in bed processing our day and discussing our “gratefuls”, she says “Mommy, what do the not-so-good people do when they take children?”
Riddle. Me. This.
All in the same flippin’ day, friends.
“Well, honey. Just things they should not be doing to children” was all I could muster at 8:00 p.m. The threat of nightmares loomed in my vision.
“Do they teach them to smoke cigarettes?” she asked.
“Ahh…yes. Yes, they do”, I replied gratefully.
She recoiled in terror. This was the worst thing that could possibly happen in her innocent little mind.
I’m leaving it at that for now.
What would you have said to either question?
you did good! it’s tough when they start putting two and two together and asking “real” questions. Instead of, “mommy, is this dinosaur milk or racecar milk?”
.-= tristan´s last blog ..…it’s all fun and games… =-.
Racecar milk or dinosaur milk? I love it!!!! Thanks for reading and commenting, Tristan!
Your children sound lovely. Good answers. Tough questions.
Stopping by from SITS.
LisaDay
.-= LisaDay´s last blog ..It was Raining, It was Pouring =-.
That’s one of the the hard parts about parenting that no one tells you about before you have babies, huh? As the mom of five, the first three 19 months apart, I can relate to your situation!
It’s hard to answer the questions we don’t have a solid grasp of ourselves! How can we? We live in a world that is broken on every level. We ourselves are broken. One day, it won’t be so as we look forward to that day!
Thank you for reading and for your wonderful comment! Really? Three of your FIVE children are 19 months apart? OK. I might need to silence myself now. :) Hee, hee. I know it’s all relative but wow.
I received an amazingly thought-provoking answer to the God question today on Facebook. I will be publishing it tomorrow. Be sure to come back in the morning to get your wheels turning!
I can totally relate with you on the exhaustion factor, though I promise it does get better.
In a few years.
Hang in there.
I have loved having both sons and a daughter. My boys are crazy and energetic and athletic and awesome; my daughter is artistic and kind and loving and just as awesome. I love seeing the differences in their personalities and marvel at the way God works it all out.
So hard explaining the bad things, isn’t it? Sounds like you did a great job, giving her as much information as she (and you) could handle without skirting the issue. As much as we would love to shelter our babies from the bad things in the world, we would be doing them a disservice by that over-protection.
Your babies sound adorable!
Heather, you are always an encouragement! Thank you! I love hearing your “it will get better” comments! I don’t want to ever paint the picture that I am not enjoying my children because I so am. But I would also be bailing on my goal of being completely real if I didn’t accurately portray the challenges of parenting the young! I always take comfort in Isaiah 40:11 …He gently leads those that have young. He leads me gently. That’s for darn sure.
I also love having both genders. I learn so much from all three.
Thank you for your kind words! Hope you are enjoying your week of redecorating/remodeling!
That is tough. I don’t have a clue what I would have said.
.-= Michelle´s last blog ..♥Today We Said Goodbye. =-.
Good a.m. Natalie,
I enjoy how you share in your entries how you enjoy those special moments that occur during your day. Even through your exhaustion you still enjoy those sweet moments.
My boys were 16 mos. apart. I treasured the end of the day talks once they were in bed and after storytime. It was a chance to know what was really going on in their little head/heart. So precious when they allow you to have that window into who they are and what they are thinking about. Loved it!
Her questions were tough ones. I think your answers were absolutely fine. On the not-so-good people one I like how you responded. It was enough for her to know that they say and do things that make children sad and hurt. So sad to have to start talking about those ‘realities’ when they are so sweet and innocent…..but very necessary. sigh….
Hugs,
Lana
Thank you, Lana Banana. I know what you mean – her innocence is so precious to me. However, I want her to be prepared and understand the world, too – I guess I just struggle with “How much is too much?” I pray to God EVERY DAY to guide me in my parenting so I trust he will “gently lead those with young” (Isaiah 40:11 – LOVE IT!) and help me in these conversations.
Totally superficial comment from me today…..thought of you, got my People magazine on Thursday!!!!!! Course it has to have another betrayal story. What is with these men???? Clearly money and fame don’t give you happiness. Have a good weekend!
Superficial? Umm…no. There is nothing superficial about People magazine. Nothing.
I have not gotten mine yet today but the mail has yet to arrive. You know my husband will be rolling his eyes if I don’t get it because I will be blaming the poor mail carrier…again.
Love that you thought of me! So glad to be your “People Magazine Sister”!
Oh my gosh. Isn’t it AMAZING how their little minds work?!?!? My oldest (who’s 4) just asked me the other day why Jesus had to die. Wow. That’s hardly an “off the cuff” kind of answer. Where to start with that one? I just left it at, “To take away our sins.” And he was satisfied for now.
We too are broaching the subject of people taking children. Not so much to scre them into staying near us, but to let them know there is a REASON we say they have to stay by us. My heart stopped for a minute when I read her question to you. I don’t know what I would have said. Thank goodness that’s the worst thing in her little mind right now-smoking. Sometimes I literally make myself crazy thinking about such “bad” people and what they do to innocent little children.
As for the cancer question…that’s also a toughie. Not only can WE not answer that question to satisfy ourselves sometimes, but to break it down into a concept that a child can understand is no easy (Read: impossible) task.
I hope your friend is healed. Doesn’t it just feel so exhausting sometimes knowing all the needs in this world and feeling so inadequate to pray for them all?!
.-= MandyP´s last blog .."Not Me" Monday! =-.
Yes, it is amazing. Have you heard of Resurrection Eggs? They are a dozen plastic eggs and inside each one, there is something that is pertinent to the story of Jesus’ death on the cross. The idea is that you open one each day in the 12 days before Easter and read the little snippet that goes with it. My kids LOVE them. Susannah asked this question last year so we went back and looked at the scriptures that talked about sacrificing animals for when someone did something “bad”. The wage of sin is blood and we talked about how that animal had to die for our shortcomings. We then discussed that when Jesus gave his life for us, he shed his blood for everyone’s sins from then on after. There was no need to sacrifice any animals anymore because Jesus paid the ultimate price and we can now be forgiven. Now I am no theologian (though my good friend is obtaining a PhD in theology right now and knocked my socks off with his answer to this post on my Facebook page – I wil be publishing it tomorrow or early next week) but this what we came up with!
I hate to think of those freak shows, too. That’s all I can say about that. My friend Mary also answered to this on my FB page and had some good wisdom. She suggests in just being real and truthful and I have to say that I agree with her. I wouldn’t share the grisly details with a three year old but a five year old needs to know that there ARE people out there who do bad things to children. I think a real discussion is good but not right before bed unless you want to be up all night soothing nightmares… We are going to revisit that conversation later this afternoon.
It can be exhausting but I think this is why I lift it all up to Him. Matthew 11:28-30 is one of my faves: Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burdens are light.
I have thought about tattoing that verse to my forehead…:) Thanks for reading and commenting, sweet Mandy!
I probably would have done the same thing! All of my kids are big question-askers, because their Daddy is, too. So I often send them to him! :P
.-= Andrea´s last blog ..Have You Heard: Intelligent Expressions and Word Filled Wednesday =-.
I’ve been known to send the tough ones to JJ as well…:) Glad I’m not the only one that does that!
Oh, my. I have no idea. That is so hard. Save them from nightmares until they understand it. You need a nap and a vacation after all of that…yikes!
This is such an adorable post. God bless you and three kids in such a small time frame!!
Sadie at heyMamas
.-= Sadie at heyMamas´s last blog ..Five minutes of downtime equals this… =-.
I know – part of the reason why I no longer have a brain…
And this is why I am not a Mom yet….I would have frozen and said uh.uh.uh.uh until they were asking a different question ;)
You did good Mommy on Fire! I cannot imagine the tough questions….and their innocence that also comes with that.
Wow, riddle me this is right. I have told my kids before that God can use things like cancer for His glory, but I don’t know that a 5 year old would completely understand that. But this was last March, maybe she’d understand it now? And how’s your dentist friend doing? Cancer is such a horrible disease, and I cringe all the more when I hear a person with a young family gets it.