2001 will forever be referred to as the “Year of Hell” for me – I absolutely now see that I needed that “Year of Hell” to finally bend at the knee but while I am incredibly thankful for the horrid experiences of that year because it led me to Him, I will also be the first one to say that I would prefer not to have to go back and do it again.
During that year, a wonderful book was published and I read it. Leif Enger released Peace Like a River and I remember being riveted by his poetic prose, his descriptive beauty, and his ability to describe the frailty of the human spirit.
I was not yet a follower of Jesus when I read it and remember reading the scene in which the father wrestles with God and thinking it was such a strange one. At the time, I had not read the story of Jacob* so had no idea of the parallelism that Enger was trying to portray.
In a nutshell, the father had a 16 year old son on the run from the law. I don’t remember the crime but he lived in the woods and the father and sister would provide food and other necessities for him. Eventually, the father began to think they were not doing what was righteous and yet, it was his son. He knew the young boy would suffer and there is not a parent in the world who wants that for their child.
Yet Jesus was God’s son. Alas, He had to watch Jesus suffer so we could be forgiven of those transgressions that make us unrighteous in His eyes.
It was a very high price.
Now I understand why the father in Peace Like a River was wrestling with God all through the night – his disobedience was causing unrest within his soul. He had been anxious, worried, scared. He awoke the next morning with a feeling of complete serenity – it was as if the go-around with God was just what was needed to quiet the tumultuous waters that were raging within.
Though it would be incredibly difficult, he was going to choose the path of righteousness and turn his son in to the authorities.
Sad? Absolutely. But obedient? Yes.
While studying Breaking Free this week, one of my lessons was entitled “To Experience God’s Peace.” Beth Moore instructed us to read Isaiah 48:18 and then it all clicked for me – nine years later, I remembered Peace Like a River and finally understood why the father had wrestled so intensely with God.
Slow learner? I’ll never deny it.
And yet, Beth tells us that “When God used the analogy of the river, He described a peace that can be retained while life twists, turns, and rolls over boulders. To have peace like a river is to have security and tranquility of heart and mind while meeting many bumps and unexpected turns on life’s journey through change. Peace is submission to a trustworthy Authority, not resignation from all activity. Remember, however, any activity that cannot be brought under the umbrella of God’s authority will prove to be a source of turmoil and exhaustion.”
Can I get an amen? Everything that I have done “not under God’s umbrella” has caused me horrid turmoil and exhaustion.
If we choose to live a life of righteousness, choose to follow God’s commands and live the way that is pleasing to Him, we are going to have peace like a river.
It doesn’t mean that life will be easy and calm – oh, heavens no. It just means that when those rapids hit, you have a strong raft that will keep you afloat.
May we all, through our obedience and attempt to be righteous, have peace like a river this week.
* To read more about Jacob, read Genesis 32:23-34 AND a wonderful book by Anita Diamont entitled The Red Tent. It’s fabuloso.
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That’s some good preachin’, Clark. :)
In all seriousness…that was some good preachin’. The book sounds phenomenal. I’ll have to check it out. 2001 was your year. 97-99ish was mine. Apparently I’m an even slower learner. So much slower I get a dash!! But, we’re still learning, right? :)
I am going to finish “Breaking Free”. Just Sunday I was looking though my notes and was inspired all over again. I want the peace that comes from following His commands. We’re so blessed to be able to push the re-do button whenever we need to.
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And now I have the Jars of Clay version of that hymn in my head…love that!
1990 was a horrible year for me, but I was still only sixteen, and it took me eight years before I truly learned what God was trying to teach me through that turmoil. Slow learner, you are in good company :)
Loved The Red Tent! I’m sure you’ve read Francine Rivers’ A Voice in the Wind (Mark of the Lion series), haven’t you? If not, you need to. That series was life-changing for me. Funny how God chooses to work through music, books, Bible studies…whatever He knows will catch our attention. I love Him for that!
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Thank you, thank you. 2004 was a year for hell for me. I needed this. :)
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Every year was hell for me, until I met the Lord. Seriously lol. Praise God for the ‘hell times’ because when you find Him, you appreciate the sweet, sweet peace all the more.
The picture is absolutely glorious! I love it, and the verse too…
Bless you heaps! and happy WFW!
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Peace like a river. . . .that phrase often reminds me of the Smoky Mountain rivers I love so much. I love to be there, love to hear the rush of water over rocks and am amazed that all of that movement calms me. And yes, that’s the kind of peace I want — peace in the rush of turns and twists and boulders and bumps. Because that is life, and I don’t want to wait for peace only in the quiet resting that never comes or comes so rarely. So, I’m trying to walk in obedience with you, friend.
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Such good insight! I Love me some Beth Moore.. and actually went thru her Breaking Free study a few years ago. It was incredible and a huge turning point for me.. I made the decision( and you are so right… not everything is ice cream and rainbows)but it is so apparent (in my own recent turmoils) that b/c I chose to accept the situation as God threw it at me for a reason. Even though I was in disbelief that women could treat me this way.. I kept reminding myself that they were just tools. HIS tools in refining me into the person he wants me to be. A few ppl marveled at the grace I could extend to these people.. but it was just something I felt called to do. Thru the angst and turmoil of this time, I had an overwhelming sense of “peace like a river’.
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I love the images of peace in a storm..for that is where real peace is proven.
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WoWzer! Some AMAZING preachin girl! We need to talk…
This is just an amazing example of how God takes those times He allows (those times yes that we go through hell…) to teach us, to mold us, to break and remake us. For me it was 1992-1993….my hell years. Whew, raging river and no calm water in sight. There was, I just couldn’t see down river that far…
AWESOME word today. AWESOME, AWESOME transparency…
I’m going to email you…I have a question for you…
peace,lori
Beautiful post Natalie. I, too, struggle with this everyday. I want to lash out at those who’ve hurt me, but God has called me to pray for them instead. The days I’m disobediant to his will is when anxiety sets in and my day is left in turmoil. When I am obediant, those are good days!
This was a beautiful post Natalie. Peace like a river; it reminds me of that song. So now I have that song in my head; thanks. But it’s a good thanks because I like to remember where to go to have peace like a river …to Jesus. As I abide in Him, I find peace no matter what’s going on around me.
Blessings and love,
Debbie
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Much truth spoken here, bless you.
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