An empty cup with no overflow. Not enough sleep. Stretched in too many different directions and often feeling like I’m letting someone down if I keep the plates spinning at the same time.
Unattainable expectations. The worst kind.
High expectations from others and my failure to lay it completely at His feet can lead to frustration and worry and yet it’s my choice as to how I react. I let the frustration and worry come instead of the trust and the knowing.
Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. – Galatians 1:10
Well, am I? Is that what’s going on here? Am I placing more importance on the approval of others than possessing the faith that I’m following His plan and direction?
Yes. As a matter of fact, I am.
Just another branch that’s being cut-off so it can hopefully one day bear fruit. Pruning.
Exasperated, I thought to myself, “It’s never enough for anyone, is it?”
Immediately, I know it’s not His voice but then I hear one that is.
“Precious child, you as you are right now is enough for me but I do know the plan I have for you and the plan is good. I’m not going to let you stay in this “enough for me” spot because I love you too much to keep you there.
Leave those who persecute you to me.
Leave those demands that make you weary and overwhelm you with a hopelessness to me.
Leave the petty stuff to me.
Leave those who are closed off to learning to me.
Leave those who judge to me.
Leave those who mistreat you to me.
Leave yourself to me.
It’s not your job anyway.”
So I release the grip a bit and I lay it at the foot of the altar knowing that I will likely have to do so again. And again. But that He, the one who was and is and is to come, stays the same.
And that alone makes me want to live for only His approval, to be a true servant, to not worry about the reactions of others as long as my actions are firmly rooted in Him.
Because that’s His job.
Alas, another Monday. Thank you God for:
521. The sound of cicadas on a sunset walk
522. Three year old giggles
523. Hearing Samuel say “That dress looks really pretty on you, Mommy.” Swoon.
524. An anniversary dinner with the man who is still my favorite date and will be forever.
525. Your reminders gifted to us through scripture.
526. Culver’s Frozen Custard and those sinful “Flavors of the Day”
527. Culver’s Vanilla Diet Pepsi – my new obsession
528. Pruning me. Yes, it’s hard. No, it’s not fun. Yes, I know it will make me more like you. And yes, I know I have a long way to go.
529. Two green tomatoes in our garden
530. Sprouting peppers
531. The awe of young children interested in how vegetables begin as a flower
532. The desire to actually try a tomato because they grew it
533. Beautiful and spiritually-mature friends who are safe
534. Being a God who sees.
535. Hearing my youngest son say “actually” in his three year old drawl
536. My Meemo who loves to have our wild crew over to swim
537. Watching my Meemo do the same things she did with me as a child now with my own children
538. A mom who loves my children about as much, if not more, than I do
539. A gentle answer that turns away wrath
540. Stories of redemption such as Unplanned by Abby Johnson, former Director of a Planned Parenthood in Texas who, after assisting in an abortion, quit her job and is now on the “other side of the fence.”
This week, may you live to please Him and Him alone.
Joining with Ann for “Multitude Monday” and Jen for “Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood”
Thank you for this post. I have often felt that no matter what I do, it’s not good enough. I constantly tell myself that I am falling short. I realize that I am only listening to the voices inside my head. And that God is greater.
Loved your list today.
Yes, He most certainly is and that voice that is telling you you aren’t enough? It’s not His. I have to remind myself of this constantly.
Thank you for reading and commenting, Barbie!
Have you ever noticed how He takes us back to His attributes and character? The more we know who He is…the more we understand and grow. ))HUGS((
Sweet friend! I’m so sorry this summer has gotten away from me – do we still have time for a playdate the second week of August?
And yes, I HAVE noticed that. So good is He, eh?
))HUGS(( right back atcha, sweet sister…
This is the hardest one for me! I am continually failing and all that goes with it. It has been such a part of my life that I am so uneasy saying ” no ” because of guilt. I know that it isn’t of God but I struggle with serving versus pleasing! It has been a rough couple of months for me on this subject and I haven’t learned yet! UGH! Thank goodness I have God’s mercy. Pray for me on this one. Love you Nat!
My beautiful SIL, yes, I will be praying for you on this one. I pray for you anyway, but specifically, now I know. I love you dearly and see nothing more beautiful than you dancing in His goodness that is just for Him. He adores you and so do I.
See you next weekend!
Very good thougths. He does love us to much to keep us there. He will prune everyone. And amen for Abby Johnson. I just saw a story on Life Site news today about another former abortion clinic worker who has had the courage to come out and speak up after hearing Abby’s story.
Love that more are emerging…Pruning is a beautiful, albeit painful thing!
Thank you for reading and commenting, Amy!
I so needed to read this today. Your first sentence…was something I had been thinking of for days. How to figure out who fills my cup and who doesn’t (who actually steals from my cup_…besides Him… I know there are people in my life that are pourers…and I work so hard to please others to a point it is a detriment to my self. So glad to not be alone. Praying for you. And sending love your way.
Also… lovely list of gifts as always. <3
I think you might have just written a “mini-post” right here, girlfriend. Wowser – love it. I might need to reflect on your words a bit then write some, too…LOVE THEM and LOVE YOU!!!!
Cooking Up Faith wrote about this same verse!
And can I say that I hear you? I mean, I really, really, really hear you. You lay your heart out so beautifully, so eloquently. The Spirit is alive in your writing.
Is it just me, or is this the best SDG day ever?? I’ve gained tons of encouragement from your post and the others I’ve visited. Thank you for sharing so well. What a blessing!
Beautiful Nat. The constant struggle of pleasing others or pleasing Him. I find so many times I get so busy that I think I am pleasing Him because I am doing…but am I doing for Him or for myself cloaked in the blanket of ministry? This week at conference Francis Chan said…”Putting God as first in your life is not enough…He should BE your life.” Wow. Can you imagine the peace we would have if Jesus..WAS our life? If everything we did, said, thought came from Him? Then we would hear His whispers of “You ARE enough!” as shouts above all the junk. Press on dear friend. I love you.
IT IS NOT MY JOB ANYWAY . . . I think I must print this in big words for my car, my refrigerator, my wall. etc.
Oh, yes. Pleasing others. Why is no so hard to say? Thank you for the reminder that God’s approval is what we need above all others.