What if this happens? How will I get all of this done? Can I really carry so much? Who will help me? What if that happens?
“Then what?” I demand and not ask.
It’s there in that overwhelmed and illogical pit that I lose sight.
Fear takes over along with anxiety and a sense of urgency that certainly doesn’t come from Him.
I beg him to rid me of this thorn in my side.
I fall victim to the lies. Again.
It happens every time I’ve lost sight.
It happens when I forget what He tells me is true.
It happens mostly when I’m tired and always when I haven’t been in the word.
Like Mary Magdalene at the foot of the cross, I panic because I can’t see Him anymore. I think that because He’s not visible, I revert back to who I was and not the new creation I really am.
I can’t see so I panic and old habits die hard.
Being in women’s ministry, I think “What would I say to someone who has come to me with this feeling?”
The response doesn’t hesitate.
Just enough light for the path you’re on. Let’s not worry ahead. Bird by bird (for all of you Anne Lamott lovers such as myself).
And here’s the big one: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)
So I breathe in His sufficient grace and hold on among the spinning.
His power is made perfect in the thorns of my flesh.
The steady was here all along. He never went anywhere.
I breathe in and refocus my eyes upon the cross and stare in wonder of His mercy.
And I thank Him for those thorns.
Thank you for your patience as I’m a bit absent around here as of late. It’s not permanent because this space is sacred to me and I don’t think I couldn’t NOT write. I just need to hold on during the spinning and focus my eyes on my steady.
Joining Michelle and all of the other thought- provoking writers…