“Mama, you know I don’t like peas!” declared a very tired and frustrated five year old boy that lives in my home.
“I know, love. But I keep putting them on your plate because one day, you might actually find that you DO like them, ” his equally weary mother responds.
“You know me better than that!” he responds. True statement – he probably won’t ever grow to love peas.
To be known.
It’s one of the most intense longings of the heart we all possesses. He made us this way for a reason.
He wants us to recognize that we are known so very intimately by Him.
He wants us to remember that He is a God who sees.
And He wants us to understand that He even knows how many hairs we have on our heads. Each of us.
That’s a lot of hair.
The verses we are studying this week hail from Psalm 139. We spent our last session on Isaiah 61 and took two to three verses through the Lectio process at a time. This time, we are going to buzz through half of Psalm 139 this week and the other half will conclude next week.
Please pick a translation (and yes, if you want to do both translations, go ahead!) and work through the steps of Lectio. Begin by praying that God will search your heart and open your mind to new teachings you are ready to learn. To review, the steps of Lectio Davina are:
First Reading: (Lectio) – Read the passage. What word or phrase stands out to me?
Second Reading: (Meditatio) – Read again. What in the text touches my life or relates to it in some way?
Third Reading: (Oratio) – Read again. What is God inviting me to do or be? How is He asking me to respond?
Fourth Reading: (Contemplatio) Read again and rest in God’s loving presence.
NIV (1984)
O Lord, you have searched me
and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O Lord.
5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths,[a] you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
The Voice
O Eternal One, You have explored my heart and know exactly who I am;
You even know the small details like when I take a seat and when I stand up again.
Even when I am far away, You know what I’m thinking.
You observe my wanderings and my sleeping, my waking and my dreaming,
and You know everything I do in more details than even I know.
You know what I’m going to say long before I say it.
It is true, Eternal One, that You know everything and everyone.
You have surrounded me on every side, behind me and before me,
and You have placed Your hand gently on my shoulder.
It is the most amazing feeling to know how deeply You know me, inside and out;
the realization of it is so great that I cannot comprehend it.
Can I go anywhere apart from Your Spirit? Is there anywhere I can go to escape Your watchful presence?
If I go up into heaven, You are there.
If I make my bed in the realm of the dead, You are there.
If I ride on the wings of morning, if I make my home in the most isolated part of the ocean,
Even then You will be there to guide me;
Your right hand will embrace me, for You are always there.
Even if I am afraid and think to myself, “There is no doubt that the darkness will swallow me, the light around me will soon be turned to night,”
You can see in the dark, for it is not dark to Your eyes.
For You the night is just as bright as the day.
Darkness and light are the same to Your eyes.
Find yourself a quiet spot and just be. Be still. Know that He is God and He’s got it. All of it. Listen and be fully-present so you can truly hear what He’s trying to tell you. Come on back for more on Thursday.
goodness me. this quote from the voice really spoke to me today.
“You even know the small details like when I take a seat and when I stand up again.”
not so much that he see’s me sitting, cause i can sit here and there. it’s more about why i sometimes “sit”, and how long it takes me to stand back up again. not as in physically sitting, but rather on how long i ‘hold onto’ things. can’t let go of things. and also about what is making me sit, and what is freeing me to stand back up again? wow….so much to think about. cause really, i think all these thoughts do literally effect my motivation in my day, and yes, can actually make me just wanna SIT all day. KWIM?
looking forward to thursday! thanks Natalie!
Yes, I know what you mean, girl. Wow – I have never thought of it this way, Barbara. Really good stuff here – it can be taken casually (like when we really do just sit or stand) or at a much deeper level which is what you expressed.
The Voice translation has done this for me – it’s been allowing me to see pieces of wisdom in the scriptures I’ve never seen before. It’s powerful.
Thanks for reading and commenting!
I am really getting a lot from the Voice translation as well! Thanks for introducing me to it.
So much in this Psalm describes how I’ve been feeling lately in my relationship with God and with those around me. Words like far away, wandering, sleeping, in the depths, the most isolated part of the ocean, overwhelmed by the darkness–these seem to be where I find myself. And yet this Psalm beautifully reminds me that He is there! And He knows me! Since losing the one who knew me most intimately, I have locked myself up behind thick, high walls, not letting anyone else in to hurt me again. I think it has to do with shame and also feeling unworthy or unlovable. I mean, if the very one who promised to love me till death decided that he was done, why would anyone else care to know or understand me? I’ve kept my deepest thoughts and feelings locked away and now find myself hurting and alone in this room to which I hold the key, fearful and convinced that no one else understands me. Not even sure that I know who I am anymore.
And yet…it says here that He knows me. He understands me. It is such a nice feeling to be known and understood. He sees it all, but not in a “now I’m gonna get you” kind of way, but with His arm gently around my shoulder, His hand holding me fast, His loving presence there in the darkness WITH me. He’s not going anywhere. He’s not afraid of my darkness. He’s no stranger to my pain. And he knows the way out. His strong hand will lead me out. “When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I!”
God is asking me to recognize that He is right here beside me–in this pain with me. He sees, He hears, He knows. I must allow Him to be God with me in the darkness. When I feel overwhelmed, talk to Him. He’s right here beside me and knows it all anyway! I think my legalistic upbringing and perfectionistic nature have fooled me into thinking that I have to get this all figured out and healed up before I can really walk closely and joyfully with Him again as I once did. But He is still here, still walking this path beside me, knowing my dreams, my fears, my hurts. Knowing and understanding Laura in a way no one else does. And though God does give us His body for comfort and strength, I will know no satisfaction deeper than being known by my God. No intimacy is greater than unity with the Lover of my soul. He knows it all anyway. I can find rest and shelter in His embrace.
I’ve been believing the lie that I’m stuck in this darkness. No more!
Two quotes I have written in my Bible next to this Psalm:
“When we are in a valley, we’re but in the valley of His cupped hands.” Ann Voskamp
“Joy rings best off deep canyon walls” unknown source
Laura, thank you for being so transparent and real here. I love your words and I hear those chains falling to the ground.
First of all, I love that you recognize that you’ve been believing the lies. You ARE loveable and you ARE of worth. The enemy would love for you to believe what he’s telling you but the fact of the matter is that your marriage ended out of something you couldn’t control. This is how he rolls – if he can get the momentum going, then he can just sit back and watch and hope it goes through the generations. It’s ugly and nasty and holds people in bondage and he loves it.
But if you begin to build up those “bullets” of scripture and base your identity in what God tell you you are, then the enemy is SO much less-effective. It doesn’t mean that things will be easy (in fact, when we walk deeper it tends to get a bit crazier because you become more of a threat) it just means that you won’t be shaken as easily.
Everything you have concluded from this reading is exactly what I hoped we would all glean. His unfailing love. How He cherishes us as His daughters. And yes, how He wants us to just rest in Him, giving us the peace of mind to know that He has it.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30
Thank you, again, for sharing your heart, Laura. It’s a lovely one.