Welcome back to the Love Well Project, friends! Thanks for having grace with me while I was away on vacation.
Today’s video is only five minutes long. Will you join me in my guest room? (It was the only quiet-ish room in the house.)
And don’t forget – I’m hosting along with sweet Angie, Cindy, and Denise . . . Inspire Me Mondays. Here are the super-easy directions:
1. Write, show, or share something that will inspire others. It can be one thing or a compilation like I did. It can be a quick thing like a quote or a longer thing like sharing some verses in the Bible and what it says to you. Anything goes.
2. No blog? No worries… share in your comments something that could inspire others.
3. Link back over here using that sweet little button made just for this or a blog link and invite your friends.
3. Link up your blog and join the community of inspiring people by using the cute little linky tool.
4. Use the URL of your specific post, not just your home page. We want to get right to the inspiration that you are sharing with us!
5. Visit a couple others, but especially the one right before you to give a little encouragement! This is the fun part ~ already encouraging and inspiring others right from the get go!
Amen. I have also come to realize something over the last 10 years of being married to my husband, and it has helped me so much. My husband and I are very, VERY different- which is great sometimes, but also not so great sometimes. Those differences explain why, after we have an argument, he fixes something I asked him to. Or why he empties the dishwasher every morning, knowing that it’s something I hate to do. Or why he makes sure my tires always have the right amount of air. THOSE are the ways he says “I’m sorry” and “I love you.” He’s not an overly affection guy, and not at all emotional. Once I stopped looking for him to SAY things, and started recognizing that he DID things, our marriage made a lot more sense to me!
So wise and mature of you, Megan. It takes us some time to figure these things out, doesn’t it? Jason and I are ten years in as well and I feel like I’m just really starting to figure out our rhythm.
Thank you for sharing this with us!
As a husband, I have to look at it in the view of my wife. In a way, I guess I’m the woman in the relationship. My wife isn’t really affectionate- she is career driven and works at home even after work, it’s hard to get her to wind down and for sure I can’t get her to do anything spontaneously like a fun day trip, a movie, etc. No one mention this to my co workers (I’m in law enforcement), but I love to cuddle, hold hands, walk with my wife… none of which EVER happens. This may sound like complaining, I know. However, like Megan mentioned in her comment, I see her doing the things that she needs to do in our relationship and the way she communicates with me overall. She speaks through what she does I guess. She is a good mother, she does take the time to listen to me when I need it (no matter how gruesome the story is), and keeps our finances in order. Like you said Mrs Snapp, I have to lower my expectations and know she is who she is and why did I marry her if I didn’t want that?
I remembered a book my pastor at the time we were getting married made us read as a pre martial study: Five Love Languages. I forget exactly what it said now (that was 11 1/2 years ago), but it spoke about learning how to understand how or what style each person communicates in your relationship- I think mine was “words of affirmation”…I want to say hers was the same. Once you learn this and cater how you communicate with your loved one with what is actually coming out of your mouth then what you say will be more effective.
Lee, I hear what you are saying. Sometimes the way we envision our spouse will show us love is not quite the reality and we have to allow ourselves to accept this, mourn it if need be, and appreciate how they DO show love. Like Megan, such wisdom here!
Marriage is such a journey and it takes time to understand the rhythm. So many jump ship when the waltz gets hard but that’s precisely how you learn the rhythm – when it’s hard!
Thank you, as always, for sharing your wisdom. I love your heart for your wife and your family.