Thank you, sweet and beautiful Bethany, for writing today’s post. I cannot tell you how thankful I am you didn’t listen to those “what-if’s” . . . You’re a HUGE blessing!!!
Fear is a debilitating feeling, isn’t it?
But sometimes, the only way to overcome it is by a giant leap of faith.
A leap of faith was what I took when I agreed to help Natalie with her book club. I mean, who would believe that I am good enough to lead women, and encourage them in their walk with God? I am not formally trained in writing, leading, or biblical studies.
Yet.
God knew His plans for me.
However, before I would be able to follow God’s plans, I had to make the decision to say “yes,” jump in with both feet, and allow myself to grow in faith by following God and obeying His commands.
During the process of this decision, I fought with myself, debated with God, and looked for any excuse to say no.
God kept telling me, “This is where I want you,” and I kept coming up with what-ifs. You know the what-if game, don’t you?
What if the ladies in the study don’t like me?
What if Natalie decides having me help was the worst decision she ever made?
What if everyone hates what I write?
I’m sure you get the idea.
“What-if’s” were flying through my head like airplanes trying to land on a runway.
But God is the air traffic controller who diverts every doubt so they never get the chance to land. The only thought that made it’s way onto the landing strip was, “I am with you. This is what I want you doing.”
Needless to say, I agreed to help but there was a time where I was stuck in the land of “analysis paralysis” as Lysa calls it in Chapter Seven of The Best Yes
“If I’m trusting myself, I will stare at all the possible ways I could fail. If I’m trusting God, I will stare at all the possible ways He’ll use this whether I fail or succeed.” ~Lysa Terkeurst
The fear of making the wrong decision made me consider all the what-ifs but there is something else Lysa says in Chapter Seven of that struck a chord with me.
“The fear of making the wrong decision shouldn’t strip the faith right out of our faith,” she said.
And, of course, she’s right. Beyond right.
While I was gripped by fear, I was allowing myself to forget one important thing, a basic foundation of my faith . . .
Trusting God.
Trusting God is the most important thing in faith and decision making. God puts opportunities in front of me but I am the one who chooses to seize them or decline and hide in my safe, little bubble.
But how do I keep myself from becoming overcome by fear again?
By this little nugget of wisdom from Lysa: “Here’s the thing that keeps me from staying stuck: there is no such thing as a perfect decision.”
Wow…did you get that? There is no perfect decision!
Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
There will never be a wrong decision if my motive is for the good of God.
God doesn’t care if I fail, He only cares that I’m glorifying Him.
This applies to everyone, including you, sweet sister. You might be weighing a tough decision right now and are stuck because you are afraid of failing. But the only way you can fail is to keep your eyes on the what-ifs and never put your trust in God.
Stop for a minute, place your trust in God, and let the heavy weight on your shoulders be lifted. There is no wrong decision, only the decision to stay paralyzed.
So for this week . . . Please answer at least one of the following in the comment section:
1. Have you ever felt paralyzed by fear when making a decision? What did you do? How did you ultimately make your final decision?
2. Lysa talks about attaining wisdom in Chapters Seven through Nine. What experience has been your biggest teacher?
3. If you are a mother, what would you tell your children about fear? If you aren’t, what would you tell someone you are mentoring about fear? Do you believe what you say? Why or why not?
4. Was there anything else that caught your attention in Chapters Seven, Eight or Nine?
So many highlights in these chapters! I’m reading on a kindle, but if it was a paperback there would be many corners bent down!:-) In Chapter 8, I loved where she wrote “Like a tree, a woman can’t carry the weight of two seasons simultaneously. In the violent struggle of trying, she’ll miss every bit of joy each season promises to bring.” And that “Release brings with it the gift of peace”. I want to experience the JOY and not to miss what is right in front of me because of fear!! And that requires me to LIVE where I am and appreciate the gifts of today the God has given me. On the subject of wisdom, I really appreciated the point about wisdom, to “Show up to practice”!! And That “Wisdom needs to be practiced day after day if we are going to know how to apply it to the Best Yes decisions when they come”!! …….and that “wisdom will become the rhythm of your mind” with practice! I get so caught up in making the right decision and tend to spin my wheels( I have a lot of practice spinning my wheels!:-))……I allow fear to weigh heavily on my shoulders and affect everything, every decision and everybody around me! As a mom, I want to give my children a different way of looking at life and experiencing the JOYS (and opportunities) all around them, and I struggle to give them that freedom (when I really would love to wrap them in bubble wrap!) I am hoping that through practice and more practice I will learn to listen and then act, knowing that God can use my decisions (when I make good ones and even when I make ones that are not so good!)
“God doesn’t care if I fail, He only cares that I’m glorifying Him.” I need this printed on every journal, mirror, and computer screen I have….. that’s where the lies fly in my head. I am so with you, Lysa and Natalie and every other woman out there who deals with analysis paralysis and we all do at some point or another.
Ultimately when I am faced with a tough decision I weight it out with Jesus. When I look at things with the eyes of Jesus, the author and perfecter of my faith, I am confident in my decision regardless of the outcome. He makes me flawless, He makes my path straight, but not easy. Here is an example: I am currently having a battle of wills with my 18 year old son. It is so much easier for me to say YES to him when the right answer is NO. No, you cannot go somewhere where there will be drinking. ( he is still in high school and has 14 weeks before he will graduate high school and enter the military) I am protecting him from himself and his bad decisions. I am currently the enemy to him, but my Best Yes for him is often NO…. and it’s not easy AT ALL….But, it will be worth it.
***Sweet Bethany, you bless me and have taught me much. You made a best yes answer… <3 to you, friend.
These chapters…actually, this whole book, has gripped me! One quote that I’ve written down in my notebook is, “Even right choices will have elements of things that might feel difficult.” That’s usually because we can’t see the whole picture.I have to remember the element of faith and hearing the voice of God.
I’d like to say to my children (according to the third question) about fear is to get to the root of that fear and to meditate on 2 Timothy 1:7.