Words. The power is overwhelming.
They can be twisted in combinations so poetic and authentic to express what resides in a heart that I find myself in awe as if I’m staring at a Van Gogh in the MoMA when they’ve been beautifully woven and placed upon a canvas.
And they can also pierce deeper than a machete when used in a way that reveals the other stuff that lives in the heart as well – the blackness, the emptiness, the hurt that spills out to the often detriment of those around the wounded.
The concept of loving well, really loving and not just in a “I love God, my family, my friends” kind of way, has been placed on my heart as of late.
Love well. WELL. Not just love – no, this isn’t enough anymore. Love well.
I love my children and husband with a wreckless abandon that often scares me to be quite honest. I check myself daily to be sure they are not becoming an idol, an unhealthy focus of my being, a place in which I rely upon for identity instead of on Him.
I know life-giving words are crucial and I consciously choose to speak them as often as I can. They are ways we can love well.
Notice I said “consciously.” Because it’s a choice I have to make.
Fatigue. Frustration in living the life I’ve always wanted and yet still wanting to “have it all” in a career. Fatigue. Feeling pulled in too many directions and spread too thin and for crying out loud, can’t someone else feed the dog?
I’ve spoken words over my family that are not life-giving and are in fact bullets through the hearts of those that are not even old enough yet to know they’ve been struck.
Not a night goes by that I don’t pray that the light of Jesus will cover over any wounds I may have inflicted during the day.
And I’m washed in His abundant grace though I am required to repent. And I do. And I ask and He gives and I bow my head in shame and He reminds.
And He gently leads. Oh, how He gently leads.
Someday my children will fly away from this nest, will pass through my life on the way to their own, and not need me as much. They’ll need to know how to read. How to write and add and multiply and probably a few history facts here and there and might need to know something about organic chemistry but I doubt it.
All of that will happen.
But more than anything, more than organic chemistry and multiplication, I want them to know that my love for them is not conditional.
There is nothing they can do to make me love them more. There is nothing they can do to make me love them less.
It’s just there. And it will remain there always, always.
Every night as I’m tucking each babe into bed, I repeat three phrases that are, in my mind, crucial for them to hear:
I love you always, always
You are fearfully and wonderfully made by God
There is nothing you could ever do to make me love you any more or any less. It’s just always there, my love for you.
And sometimes eyes roll and I hear a “Mom, I know…” in a sing-song giggle yet I see the smile, the pleased grin that says they need to hear it every single night.
So they do.
Because in speaking those words, those life-giving words, while teaching them also about His abundant grace, we model. We point. We lead. We herd.
Towards Him.
I’m joining in with Ann at “A Holy Experience” for Walk With Him Wednesday and with Kristen from “We Are THAT Family” for Works for Me Wednesday…
POWERFUL post! I ran across your blog when I was searching for “things moms need to hear” for my message on Sunday…found your post…GREAT STUFF! God is using you to encourage many moms…keep up the good work!!
Wow, Tim. Thanks. Your encouragement is huge to me today – thank you for being God’s vessel. Blessings to you as you prepare your sermon!
I’m in tears. I really needed to read this today. It has been an awful day, and I know I have sent bullets through the hearts of my loved ones. I need His grace and mercy so badly. Thank you.
Oh, girl. Been there, done that. And will be there and do that again.
I just prayed for Christ’s light to cover any wounds and for His grace and mercy to wash over you, a mommy who loves her children and is bound by the limitations of the flesh.
Because all of us parents just are. And luckily, He knows that.
Love to you, dear friend. Praying for your peace.
amen :-)
What a lovely post! I came here via A Holy Experience and am so very grateful to find & read your words. Thank you!
Thank you and thanks for visiting, Jess!
I SO needed this today. My patience was at an end tonight and I heard myself uttering words that were unkind in an attempt just to get them to bed, all the while, thinking, can’t someone else help? Can’t they just do it themselves? And I know that’s just my opportunity to take a deep breath and rely on Him for the words to speak instead of trying to make things happen in my own time. Definitely something I need to work on… Thanks so much for the encouragement. You always brighten my day. :)
Yes, I hear you girl. Hence the “for crying out loud can’t someone else feed the dog?” comment.
While He won’t feed the dog for us (well, physically) He is there with us and IS that “someone else” who can help. Whew. I’m thinking I’d pick Him to be the one with me anyway. :)
Tomorrow will be a new day with new mercies. Praise Him for that.
Thank you for your kind words and encouragement, girl. You are a joy to me.
Words are so powerful, thanks be to God for his word that has power to give life! I too often speak words of death rather than life so thank you fir this post. Such an encouragement.
So, so good. It really struck me the part where you said bullets they aren’t even old enough to know they’ve been struck with. A friend and I were just talking about how we remember things our dads said to us off the cuff that are with us to this day.
Oh, but the words of love. And another thing we must speak these words to ourselves too. Because what good is a mother riddled with bullets of her own making. Words of life and words of love those are the healing that binds us together. Thank you so much for this beautiful, honest post. You ALWAYS touch my heart. ~Jessica
Simply.Beautiful.